Tree-Hugging Dirt Worship

April 30, 2013

Safety Poem

Filed under: Soapbox — Tags: , , , — paragardener @ 5:08 pm

Let’s make the world safe

Let’s make ourselves safe from drugs

lock up the nutmeg and cinnamon

and classify naughty books

and ban dangerous speech

and make the world safe from weapons

register every box-cutter

license every gas pump attendant

what do you really need a sledgehammer for, anyways?

and make the world safe for children

a chip in every buttock

a stent in every neck

under constant armed guard

those people can keep their music and quaint cuisine

but

we can’t afford them the luxury

of their irrational beliefs

and

let’s burn everything written before 1800

then we’ll make the world safe from bad choices

all dates set up by E-Harmony

unannounced home inspections

denim jackets and hair grease banned

make the world safe from cancer

half of all known chemicals are carcinogens

let’s push them outside the membrane

of our glassed-in freedom dome

let’s make the world safe from bad poetr

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2 Comments »

  1. The ending is hilarious!

    Comment by freelearner — May 3, 2013 @ 4:03 am

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